As temperatures rise outside, I’m seeing the summer doldrums hit inside. You’ve been working SO hard all year, and that’s only natural. Let’s dive into that a bit and see what the most successful people do to push on to their goals. Time for a “gut check”!
In 2011, I spent five long, full & amazing days at Tony Robbins Business Mastery. Two things impacted me very much. I’d like to share them with you:
1. The Three S’s – “Story, State & Strategy”
These are the three things that take you to your goals. Most people make the mistake of thinking strategy is the most important of the three, when it’s actually “story”. Story speaks to mindset. Story is the perception that creates your reality. Story is the foundational domino, then comes “state” (the particular condition you are in at a specific time) and only then is “strategy” important.
What story are you telling yourself? What story are you stuck in?
We all have stories. I hear this come up in coaching calls all the time. “I’m just not good at that.” Or “I’ve never been good at that.” Doesn’t matter what the topic at hand is – could be making videos, time blocking, recruiting calls, having tough conversations, looking at the p&l. Or if you’re an agent – maybe it’s prospecting, knowing your numbers or following a schedule. Every time you say these things, you are reinforcing that story in your own head and pretty soon in the heads of everyone around you. It’s called a self-fulfilling prophecy.
What would happen if you started telling yourself a different story? I’m betting your life would change. And change drastically. Especially when the story surrounds important things in your life.
I used to tell myself the story that because I was an introvert, I would never be comfortable presenting in public. That was my experience growing up, it was affirmed over & over & over when my face turned bright red and my hands sweated when I got up in front of the class. I continued to tell myself that story for a long time into adulthood. Until one day in 2012, when I got a call that Gary Keller wanted me to be on stage at Mega Camp. I had to make a choice then. I’m glad to say, I chose a new story. My new story is “I LOVE presenting and sharing about things I am an expert on because I have the ability to help people. It’s my mission to raise the bar, impact others and I embrace opportunities to present.”
What new story do YOU need to tell yourself? And how do you go about doing that?
One way you can do this is by practicing affirmations. I want to share an app I use that makes affirmations not only easy, it also makes them POWERFUL. It’s called ThinkUp. The app has ideas for affirmations (lots of categories to browse from – confidence, gratitude, health, love, relationships, weight loss – you name it they have something for you) OR you can make up your own. Once you have your affirmations, you type them in and record them. The app adds music.
When you choose your affirmations, choose POWERFUL words that evoke powerful FEELINGS. Here’s an example of how one of my clients & I tweaked an affirmation this week. She is working on her mindset around embracing perpetual change because that doesn’t come naturally to her and she knows it will help her be a more successful EA.
- Initial go: “I am on an ever changing journey.”
- Next go: “I am EXCITED to be on an ever changing journey.”
- Final go: “I am EXCITED to be on an ever changing journey to the life of my dreams!”
I listen to my affirmations first thing in the morning. I play them out loud (you can do it in your car on the way to the office or to an appointment) and after I hear each one said, I repeat it out loud. There’s something really impactful about hearing affirmations in your own voice and then saying them again yourself. Try it and let me know what you think.
Better yet – set it up TODAY before you go to bed. Did you know that if you take action on a goal within 24 hours of setting the goal, you are 85% more likely to achieve it? I CHALLENGE you to text me your affirmations: 703-608-9991.
Now let’s talk “State”.
You probably started the year with great intentions, great plans and a new routine. And if you’re like most people, by the time July comes, well – it’s not so great any more. Which means that when you arrive at the office to jump in to lead gen, talent gen or start your “big rocks” – your “state” is not at its best. So you are sabotaging your success before you even start.
As most of my clients have heard me say, “Today starts yesterday”. What are you doing each day to prepare to succeed tomorrow?
- Do you have a timeblocked schedule?
- Are your “big rocks” on your calendar?
- Do you have a “must do” list instead of a “to do” list?
- Do you need to meal prep?
- Have you scheduled time with family, time for fitness, time for fun?
- Do you know what you’re wearing?
- Do you have gas in your car?
- Do you know where your wallet is?
Some of these sound silly. Yet preparing the night before means you have ALL of your energy available for the most important things the next day.
If you need a re-set for “state”, try Gary Keller’s Energy Plan.
“I get up every day by six AM and meditate and pray–for spiritual energy. Then, I exercise and eat–for physical energy. Afterward, I hug, kiss, and laugh with my family–for emotional energy–and try to do it so that I get to spend time with all of them and still get to the office between eight AM and nine AM. I then plan and calendar my day–for mental energy–and spend my first, most energized hours in the office working hard on lead generation and recruiting talent–for business energy. I never slack off before eleven AM.” – Gary Keller, The Millionaire Real Estate Agent
To PLUS this, I’d personally recommend you write down three gratitudes each day. Gratitude is the highest energy you can have.
2. The 80/20 Rule
At Tony Robbins Business Mastery, I met a guy who was the personal trainer to the World MMA Champion. He told me they spend 20% of their time doing physical training, and 80% working on mental training. That fascinated me. Because we spend tons of time doing contract training, script practice, taking negotiating classes and doing all kinds of real estate related training. And what are we doing to develop emotional & psychological strength?
(High Five if you’re in coaching. That’s a great start! )
Here’s what Tony said:
“The most painful mistake I see in first-time entrepreneurs is thinking that just having a business plan or a great concept is enough to guarantee success. It’s not. Business success is 80% psychology and 20% mechanics. And, frankly, most people’s psychology is not meant for building a business.”
“My business advice? Think honestly about who you are, what you want to accomplish, and what mindset you need to have to get there. Because the biggest thing that will hold you back is your own nature. Few people are natural risk-takers or emotionally ready for the challenges of building a business. You can’t just sign up for a marathon and run it without ever training. You have to increase your capacity and become fit. Being an entrepreneur requires similar kinds of emotional and psychological fitness so that you don’t become the chokehold on your business’s success.”
Tony was speaking to entrepreneurs. But I share this with ALL of you even though half of you receiving this email are EAs or Directors of Operations. If you are “riding shotgun” with your rainmaker (who is an entrepreneur), then this applies to you as well. Because unlike the average EA, we operate as intrepreneurs, building within the business.
So besides being in coaching, what else can you do to develop emotional & psychological fitness? Here are a few ideas:
- Be ok with failing. Instead of asking permission, ask forgiveness. Fail forward. A lot.
- Push yourself outside of work. Compete in something that doesn’t come naturally. Or compete in something you’re good at and push yourself past where you’ve ever gone before.
- Step outside your comfort zone. Uncomfortable going in a hospital? Sign up to volunteer there. Uncomfortable talking to strangers? Volunteer at a food kitchen.
- Read (or re-read) Fierce Conversations by Susan Scott. Then have that conversation you know you need to have – whether it’s at the office or with a loved one.
You can probably think of a million other ideas. The point is to find places that will stretch you emotionally & psychologically. Where you can develop strength and endurance. Doing so will bring you closer to your goals and bring you there faster.
So let’s recap. It’s mid-year. We have BIG goals. Today it’s time to:
- Check your story. (What new story will you tell yourself? What affirmations will transform you?)
- Check your state. (Today starts yesterday. Re-establish your routine. Gary Keller Energy Plan. Gratitudes)
- Develop emotional & psychological fitness. (Find places to practice stretching & develop endurance)
NOW. And only now. Take a look at your goals. You’re ready to do this.
If you’re up for the challenge. TEXT ME (703-608-9991) and tell me what action you took TODAY.
PS – For those of you who are tracking way ahead – KUDOS! Is it time to raise your sights? #nolimits